Need help for a character's name? And is she a mary-sue?
Topic: How to write a character list
July 15, 2019 / By Ivy Question:
She is fifteen.
She is pixie-like in stature with red-brown hair that comes to the center of her back, she is cream-skinned and has glittering blue-green eyes. She also has ruby red lips that are always in a smile.
She has a fiery personality, caring deeply for everyone in the small town she lives in. She respects everyone and everyone's opinions even if she doesn't agree with them. She works as a waitress in a local cafe and lives with her older brother.
But she can be too trusting, which gets her in trouble. She gains the hearts of two guys, one of them who could let her live forever, but she goes for the normal, human one. She does have dreams of seeing the world. She loves to sing, write and play the piano.
So...wat could her first name be? And is she a Mary-Sue?? I want a character that people can relate to...not someone who's too perfect.
And any ways I could change her? make her more realistic?
Best Answers: Need help for a character's name? And is she a mary-sue?
Ellie | 7 days ago
I have to tell you something, I wrote a 50 chapter romance story and I never once mentioned what my female lead character looked like, at all, on purpose. Not only did no one notice, but I had readers gush over how 'pretty' she was!
Please no blue-green eyes, either describe them as 'the color of a storm tossed sea' or 'the color of leaves in spring' or something like that, and no 'red-brown' hair, 'the color of polished mahogany' or 'auburn' works much better
The best way to physically describe a character is to have someone else in the story do it, instead of just listing her features. Like, "He looked into her mischevious green eyes, let his eyes travel down to her luscious ruby lips, and melted" or, "She envied that mane of glorious auburn hair" or "she was so tiny that she had to crane her neck to look up at him"
EDIT: re: Mary Sues, don't be afraid to write a story with a Mary Sue in it, just write the best Mary Sue story ever written and no one will care
👍 202 | 👎 7
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Originally Answered: Concerned my character is a Mary-Sue?
A Mary Sue can be perfect or she can be riddled with flaws. She can be plain or she can be extraordinary. She can be rich, she can be poor, she can be unique, she can blend in...
... if a Mary Sue can be all of those things, don't you get the feeling that it's not the aspects of the character that makes her a Mary Sue, but something else entirely?
A Mary Sue isn't the result of bad characterization or poor decisions about appearance or backstory; she's the result of bad storytelling and poor writing skills. When someone reads a scene that's badly written, the easiest thing to blame is the character. The character feels fake and unrealistic and becomes a Mary Sue, but it's really the writer's inability to write the scene that makes her what she is.
A good writer can take ANY character and make them feel real. Even a character that seems to have every trait of a Mary Sue can come alive and lose her Mary Sue feeling when she's under the care of a talented writer.
If you're worried about your character, it means you're becoming a better writer. Don't avoid certain characteristics just because you think they're Mary Sueish. Just continue to practice writing and, after enough practice, you'll be amazed that your characters don't have the same flatness or threatening aspects of Mary Sue that seem to haunt you now.
Pixie-like in stature? She's six inches tall?
Mary Sue big time, I'm afraid. Nobody smiles all the time. Nobody respects _everyone_ or _everyone's opinions_. Think about what you are saying - she respects child molestors? The opinions of racist bigots? In any case, how can she have a fiery personality and respect everyone's opinions at the same time? A fiery personality would mean she often _failed_ to respect other people and instead snapped at them. If you say your character has a non-ideal personality then that will mean she behaves in non-ideal ways...and not just when it doesn't matter.
And why does a fifteen year old live with a brother? I'd have thought that would be a long way down the list of suitable relatives, especially since she seems to be having a perfectly normal life so it must be a while since she lost her parents.
👍 80 | 👎 4
The description will sound better if you get rid of some of the qualities:
Cream, pixie-like, glittering, ruby... All nightmarish words as far as I'm concerned.
She also has some artistic talents, I see... So is she good at math and science? If so, why doesn't she love those? Is she perhaps lazy? If not, make sure to mention that she worries about her grades in those classes.
The living with her older brother is also dangerous... Why? Were her parents in a car crash? How much older than her is he? Unless her parents have some reason not to have her live with them (severe economic burden, child abuse, etc), they should be dead.
My guess is car crash- it's a common one. And one of them expresses that they're to blame for making them fight or distracting them or telling them something important, etc... And the other says they're not responsible... In the end, the "culpable" one has decided that it's not really his(her) fault, and that she should live her life to the fullest, guilt-free, for her parents!
She works as a waitress.... So she must be a college student or out of college. In a small town, if there are college students or other young adults, people are not likely to hire a highschool student- she should be focusing on her studies, not working! (Unless she's a drop-out, which is cool, too.)
Add some depth to her- not ALL negatives, but quirks. When she's reciting stuff- counting, saying the alphabet, or repeating a poem or story- she snaps her fingers. She's allergic to her best friend's cat. She rolls her eyes a lot.
Why does she go with the human? Is she afraid to live forever? Maybe when her parents died, she was depressed and cut herself or tried to commit suicide. Maybe she saw that death was the natural course of life.
Stuff like this.
👍 74 | 👎 1
I really wouldn't choose Mary-Sue if you want to make her relatable - it's a very stereotypical name and people will automatically have a mental picture of their own making on hearing it. I'd choose something a little unique, but not new-agey. I liked someone else's idea of Fern. Perhaps Annaleigh?
Actually, a name I think is perfect for this character is Vivian, or Vivianne.
Makes me think of someone beautiful, fiery and vibrant.
👍 68 | 👎 -2
Although her physical characteristics remind me of Bella Swan (ick!) I do believe you have struck a gem on this character. For the love of god, please, please, PLEASE don't make her clumsy!
Make her headstrong, and not needed to be saved from the mushy love interest in every situation she finds herself in. She can be intelligent, but prejudice. Witty, but ignorant. Humorous, but short tempered.
For the name, I think 'Rose' fits well... If not try the following:
- Amelia (Millie)
Hope I helped. :)
👍 62 | 👎 -5
Originally Answered: Is my hero character a Mary Sue?
Well, he isn't exactly a Mary-Sue, but he is very...average, even with his super-human powers (but maybe that's just at first).
He reminds me of Ganta from Deadman Wonderland - he's a baby at first who can't do anything with his ability, but he become more mature later on when his friends start to die.
I'd say to get rid of a few things like the fact he knows how to play chess and such - since he seems like a desperate adolescent who wants to save his friends, only mature, adultlike characters should play chess (in my opinion).
And later on when he has to fight this alter-ego...well, it's a classic idea so I can't say I don't like it because it's not bad, but make sure it makes sense he has an alter ego, not just "oh, in this land, it's everyone's opposite, so he has an alter ego".
It makes sense, but it's not as interesting...
Don't forget to include some flashbacks from a characters' past because those are usually very suspenseful and interesting.
I didn't really read all of what you wrote, but I skimmed through it and I hope this helps.