Topic: Just in case someone starts feeling too important to use
June 17, 2019 / By Raphaela Question:
Unfortunately in life you have to deal with females. And the misfortune is tripled if, like me, you're a male attracted to them. Females, as many know, live in a world where everything is frilly and sugary and they exploit males by using their looks and their mind tricks.
I was wondering if there was some known model of how females behave in common competitive or cooperative scenarios. I'm interested if there are some known payoff matrices that explains, given some environmental starting conditions, how females react to verbal or non-verbal stimuli.
It's widely known that females quickly disregard people that they consider not worthy of their precious time and presence, by avoiding them, ridiculing or diminishing them or by "friend-zoning" them (in case they might be useful for later purposes).
Of course, I'm not saying that females are rational players, but that might at least be a guideline to predict their behaviour.
Most players don't behave according to THE rational strategy, that's not an insult btw.
@CherryBlossom: Thanks for your answer, but I'm not a female (maybe you've read only the question). Don't delete it, anyway. If you feel, just add to it.
Meredith | 10 days ago
Well for us, unfortunately, in life, we have to deal with male a$sholes all the time. They are so many, that it makes us go CRAZY to find that one gem that we dream to have for ourselves, so that we could show our true femininity to, and our soul's true beauty to them. You can't show your inner beauty with people who, not only that can't appreciate that, but don't even know how to recognize it when they see it.
I go by my standars and values.
Another thing I noticed is that being very judgemental with men has saved me from ending up with another one of those unspecial a$sholes. So, a woman has to be judgemental and strict when looking for a man for long-term. Making compromises and being accepting over the top does NOT take you anywhere, but get you stuck in a dead end. One should never make compromises when choosing a man, and she should NEVER force herself to accept traits that a guy lacks, that are deal-breakers and very important to her, just because he happens to treat her nice, FOR NOW, and that he looks good.
No, at the beginning, the way he treats you has little importance. It is important, but not decisive at all. All guys try their best to impress a woman at the beginning of courtship, so, they put on their best mask.
A woman should observe his behavior out in the world, how they treat other women, how they talk about their own family, especially mother and sisters (if they have any); how they talk about ex-girlfriends, how they talk about women in general; how they act in public; how they talk to other people and so on and so forth. Observe them.
Then, ask him questions about his deal-breakers, what he wants into a woman, what he expects from one. Of course, at the beginning, they will conceal a lot of what they say, in order not to scare you off and create the best impression. But, the more time you spend with them, they will relax more and more, and will start becoming more and more honest, therefore, revealing more about themselves, on a true level. Wtach them how they act when they are comfortable and relaxed.
Ultimately, you, yourself, HAVE to have a set list of traits you want in a guy. It doesn't have to be a long list, because it has to stay realistic. Three to five traits would be enough, but ones that are deal-breakers for you, very important ones. If he doesn't have ONE of them, then there could be a problem.
And most importantly, listen to your gut feeling. It saved me a lot of times. Even when I was having mixed feelings about someone, because they weren't being clear with me, my gut feeling always led me to the right assumptions.
And pay attention to how he makes you feel, overall. How do you feel when you are around him? If he tries his best to make you feel good, but you still have an awkward feeling when with him, uncomfortable, weird, enstranged, then something must not be right indeed, and he most probably is not the kind of guy for you to connect with.
And also, after you two have gotten to know each other a bit, and you have somewhat of an overall ''profile'' of them in your mind, which this would be after around a month or two of intense talking and seeing each other, you should put your cards on the table and make it very clear to him what you want from him, if you have decided that you want to date him. So, this would be the time you tell him what you expect and want from him. You are interested in him, you would like a relationship with him, but you don't know what he wants, so: invite him to put his cards down, too. Then see what he comes up with. From then on, it should be clear: If he says he feels the same, then, there you go, provided that you know he is not some kind of player or anything like that (which that should be obvious even during the first 3 dates for you to read). And if he keeps giving you diffuse answers and nothing to the point; basicly, telling you much, but nothing at the same time, to answer your questions, then he is dragging you along, which means you don't wanna waste time with this, so you walk out of it and stop dating him. If he says he wants to take it slower, and you wanna date him, then comply. It's always good to take it slow, rather than too fast. Also, you need to make sure you both are at the same level of maturity, have same priorities, are on the same page.
Anyway, this is how I did it, all put in a nutshell. There is so much to say about this. Now I'm with a wonderful guy, the best I could have ever hoped to have.
What is wrong with you!! Just be funny/witty/friendly and i'm sure women would want to spend their time with you.. Also females aren't players, they OWN the game. :)
Ivan is liking Svetlana Groschkyna, is Russkiye ballet singer and modelling, making many rouble for Mother Russia is good citizen.
"Frilly and sugary," really? "They exploit males by using their looks and their mind tricks," really? "Females are [not] rational players," really?
Woman are just like men. We are not alien entities, nor can we be bundled into one too hard basket. We are all unique. Some women, like some men are superficial, some are deep, some are rational, some are irrational. You can't predict the behaviour of 50% of the population (that's an irrational expectation).
I did offer you a start of a model, but you refused it dear Gianni. It's your loss.
I actually have found most of the answer through thorough research. And I have come up with universal models that would include over 90% of all females.
And you need to stop despising females so much. If you ever hope to get through life without them causing you so much trouble, you're going to have to learn to play by their game and avoid projecting negative body language issued from your feelings.
They are not rational, more guided by emotion and instinct.
Said instinct leads them to men they perceive as dominant. A criminal has established dominance through force, while a rich man has established dominance through economic power.
Therefore, there are two things you need to be competitive. Either a criminal record, or a large bank account.
That's neither an answer - but you just brought an interesting topic. So I am really curious about the real answers, just for comparison.